HEY!! Well it was another day at summer school. It wasn't that bad. It was actually a lot of fun. Why you might ask? Well for starters I got caught up on all my work from when I was at girls camp. Something that just poped into my head was that a lot of the kids I hangout with are at summer school with me. I'm still trying to figure out if that is a bad thing, to me it isn't because in general they are all great friends. They get into trouble every once in a while (well just about once a week.) But they do get their work done but what my million dollor question is, are my friends the friends i should be hanging out with? I'm not sure. I mean, c'mon I have known most of them for a long time, but does that make them my friends? Well my sister wants to go swiming and I don't blame her--it's hot. I'll try to post tomorrow.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
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4 comments:
Hey, Tina, I just have a couple of minutes to respond a bit to your question. You questioned whether your friends are indeed your friends. I would just like to quickly say that a true friend wants for you (and out of you) only your very best. Going to summer school alone certainly does not make one "bad." And just because most of your friends are in summer school with you does not make them "bad" any more than it makes you "bad." There are lots of reasons that kids can find themselves in summer school. Some kids do have problems learning; some have problems testing; some are just lazy; some don't care enough to do their very best. But what came to my mind when reading your question is that, in my opinion, if someone is your TRUE friend, you would most likely not be questioning that fact or posing that question. I have a few TRUE friends, and I have never found myself questioning whether or not they are in fact TRUE friends.
Also, from a mother's perspective a little rambling here... My kids are all grown now (41 and 37). When my daughter was growing up, I never ever worried about what she would do, who she would hang out with, etc. If she thought it was stupid to do something, she thought it was stupid, even if everyone else might be doing it.
My son, on the other hand, never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings or "rock the boat," so I was somewhat more concerned about him. He also seemed to befriend kids who really needed a good friend, kids that I sometimes lovingly referred to as "strays." So we would have them around our house a lot and tried to treat them like family. Usually that worked out just fine, but sometimes it didn't. As a mother, I would see that, whereas I hoped that my son and his standards would help raise up his friend and that friend's standards, the influence would go the other way. As a teacher, I've seen that also. One kid will befriend another wanting to "help" him, but sometimes the influence goes the other way. With my son, that is where we, as parents, would step in and (gently) remove that influence that we did not find positive. I've rambled a lot, and this might not make much sense to you, but what I am trying to say is this. Ask yourself, does being around your friends lift you up or bring you down (and I'm not just talking about your mood). If you don't feel like a better person for being around them, then maybe it is time to seek new friends. And there WILL be those new friends. God doesn't just give us something different; He always gives us something better.
Thanks for listening to an older viewpoint. And if you want the ultimate answer, go to Jeremiah 29: 11-13 and see what God's plan is for you. Actually, I'll make it easy on you --
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for me with all your heart. And I will be found by you, says the Lord."
Amen, Granny Mike! She's right on Amanda! If they are truly good friends, they will want what's best for you and if you are truly their friend it will be mutual.
I keep wondering though, if summer school is such a bummer, how come you're all there? Is this a case of do what the others do/did to fit in, or have you thought all the ramifications through and made the best possible decision for you? If you needed a little extra boost to get the most out of your educational opportunities and went for it at summer school, then more power to you girl! But if you are not there to better yourself and help your friends better themselves, then you just might be wasting your time. When God closes a door, He opens a window. So don't forget to check out that "cool breeze" blowing in on you! ;) It's your turn to evaluate youself...
Hi Tina - I just had to jump in here. The fact that you are asking this million dollar question makes me think that posibbly you are questioning the values of the friends you now have. As we grow up our priorities change. Growth and change are good, but then you have to adjust to those changes. This may mean that you might make some other friends also, some new ones. These new ones might share with you some new activities, something that you both really like to do, say like dancing, or singing, or whatever. The point is that when I was in grades 7 & 8 I had some friends but when I went to high school (9-12 grades) I ended up with many more friend who like many more different things. As we grow we change, and change is really good. Just make sure the people you are hanging out with are good people that really do care about you! Let us know how you made out with this question - what do you think??
Nancy in Connecticut, USA
tina, it's very mature of you to question whether your friends are good for you. are these kids who try to do well in school and help others, or are they kids who only think of themselves and like to stir up trouble for others? no one is perfect and god doesn't expect perfection (neither do the rest of us humans!), but god does expect you to do and be the best you can. that's what you should expect from friends: that they *try* to be the best people they possibly can.
:)
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